Tuesday, November 6, 2012

The jig is up...maybe??

WARNING.  DO NOT LET YOUR CHILDREN READ THIS POST.  I mean, really, it's a bit weird if you let your kids read my blog anyway, but whatevs, it's your choice, I'm not here to judge.  I am saying, though, REPEAT:  DON'T LET THEM READ THIS ONE.

OK?  We're good?

Alright.

So, we're walking to school yesterday morning, and out of the blue, AJ says, totally matter-of-factly: "You know, Santa's not real."

Mackenzie: "OH MY GOD SHUT UP YES HE IS!!!!!!!!!"

Me: "Uh, wow, look, there's a...hmmm...uh, big piece of dog poo!!!!!"

AJ: "Seriously.  He's not real."

Mackenzie: "STOP SAYING THAT, SANTA IS TOTALLY REAL!!!"

Me (because obviously the poo distraction isn't working): "OK, AJ, what makes you say Santa isn't real?"

AJ: "There's no way he can do it.  The only way he could possibly work is by magic, and magic is NOT real."

Me (totally floundering here, Mackenzie looks horrified and AJ looks super sure of himself and I am totally taken by surprise and am not sure what the hell to say): "Well, OK, but don't you believe in the magic of Christmas?  I know I do!"

AJ: "Well, you shouldn't believe in magic, because magic is totally fake."

Then, THANK GOD, he saw a little buddy of his getting out of their vehicle and he took off running.

He hasn't mentioned the whole Santa thing again, but I know my kid, and I know that he was dead serious.  I was blessed with (cursed with???) an extremely logical-minded child, and he is well aware that magic is a ruse.  He knows it's not real, that magic is just tricks.  And so saying that Santa is "magic" just doesn't cut it.  He needs a better explanation than that.  He also understands that the world is a big place.  He knows it takes us all day just to get to Arizona, that our friends from Australia are from the 'other side of the world', that his Grandpa lives alllllllll the way in Florida...so how the hell would Santa possibly get to every single kid in the world in one night?  He has Muslim friends in his class who don't get visits from Santa. He knows that reindeer can't fly (unlike his mother, who, for an embarrassingly long time, thought that reindeer were fictional characters, like unicorns).  And he knows that nobody in their right mind would ACTUALLY try to fit themselves down a chimney.

The super-secure hiding of the presents, the Santa-only wrapping paper that also needs to be very well-hidden, trying to explain why Santa will NOT be bringing you a pony/a baby sister/a fancy convertible/your very own motorhome...as much as it would make my life easier for the whole Santa deal to be blown wide open (my kids will still get presents from Santa for as long as they live in this house), he's only 6.  I have no intention of confirming or denying anything at this point, but I'm not sure I'm ready for him to totally stop believing.

Ideas?  Help me!

1 comment:

  1. My daughter is 30 my son is 28 and I will stand by the statement that on most days I AM FOUR YEARS OLD ...if ya don't believe ya don't get the Santa present..fortunately, my son the scientist figured that out and shut up his sister and the big baby of a Dad years ago...geeze the grand dog even has a stocking...
    My son will argue anyone into a frenzy about Jesus, but Santa he is off limits.

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